Hello readers, I have an exciting update for you, and perhaps one I should have shared sooner. Part of my procrastination is due to the fact that I have a one-track mind, and my thoughts on climate change were so close to the surface that I felt I had to strike while the iron is hot, as they say. But to be honest, part of the procrastination was due to the fact that as much as I had been eagerly anticipating this event, I was in a weird emotional state afterward that I didn’t expect, and therefore wasn’t sure how to write about it.
The big news is that on May 12, in a commencement ceremony that began at 3:30 in the afternoon, I officially graduated with a certificate in Christian Studies from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. I find it quite ironic and fitting that this certificate which the pandemic inspired me to seek was formally issued the day after the United States officially declared the pandemic emergency behind us, symbolically marking, for both the country and me, the close of one chapter and the beginning of a new, uncertain one.
I did not actually attend the ceremony in-person. Given that I took all of my courses online, I did not feel a personal connection to the campus like I did when I graduated from Carroll University, and I think this would have made it especially awkward to ask for assistance with the logistics like finding my way across the stage. But my name was called out on the livestream as someone graduating in absentia. The funny thing was, since they didn’t know me either, they mispronounced my last name, but that’s alright. I had lots of company though, with several names I recognized from my classes also graduating in absentia. In one sense, it felt strange, like something important was missing by not attending in-person. I completely understand why high school and college students who had no choice but a virtual commencement during the pandemic were sad. There is something special about dressing up in the cap and gown, the pageantry of processing in, and moving the tassel on your cap from right to left, about hearing your name called, walking across the stage and hearing friends and loved ones cheer for you. I do worry about what might be lost with the trend toward online college degrees if everyone in future generations gets an education disconnected from the history and tradition of campus life topped off with commencement. Also, given that I think the video of the ceremony will be available at least until next May, it didn’t seem necessary to ask family to block off the commencement ceremony time on the calendar, so I believe Grandma had a doctor appointment my parents drove her to while I tuned in to commencement from my bedroom. But that evening when they got home, Mom made one of my favorite dinners, taco meat and refried beans over cauliflower rice, and I told them all about the ceremony, so I still felt as though the day was special.
It was a joyful but dignified ceremony. Graduates processed into the chapel to the traditional graduation processional played on the organ, two readings were selected—Isaiah 55:8-12 and 2 Timothy 4:1-8—and the congregation sang a couple hymns, also played on the organ. I wish I could tell you which hymns, but they were not hymns I was familiar with. A print program from the ceremony was mailed to me along with the leather diploma cover for my official certificate, which was mailed separately and arrived July 1. The names and lyrics of the hymns are probably listed in the print program, but I could not find a digital copy of the program. But that is alright. What matters is they were beautiful. The ceremony actually reminded me more of the Catholic mass I attended every week growing up, than the evangelical worship I had gotten used to with modern songs and a praise band, but I found this solemn style refreshing. But the best part of the ceremony was the keynote address, given by Sanji Lukas, a 1992 graduate of Trinity, and the founder of Reaching India Ministries International. I think he also spoke at our church for HarvestFest last October.
White American pastors give excellent, biblically sound sermons, but international speakers take preaching and Christian devotion to a whole new level, perhaps because persecution of Christians—real, brutal persecution, not the persecution Christian nationalists say Christians in America face when they cannot say Merry Christmas or display the ten commandments in a government building—is rampant in the global south, and much of the global south is still unreached by the gospel. When I was a new Evangelical, I was familiar with the concept of people struggling with figurative demons like alcoholism or pride, but I found it strange at first when international speakers would mention that loved ones had once been literally possessed by demons, which Sanji Lukas talks about in his speech. He also talks about a member of his family miraculously healed from epilepsy in Trinity’s chapel. You just don’t really hear about literal demon possession or miraculous healing happening in America. But a pastor once explained that because these parts of the world face persecution and have limited if any access to the Bible, God intervenes supernaturally to reach people through visions and miraculous healing, and the devil works harder in these parts of the world too.
Sanji Lukas outlined four seeds necessary for fruitful ministry. We must preach the word, trusting in the sufficiency of God’s word, and believing in the power of the gospel to change lives. We must pray earnestly because prayer is how Paul was able to do great things despite many challenges, and because prayer purifies the heart and protects us from the devil’s schemes. We must partner with others because ministry in isolation is unbiblical and dangerous. Finally, we must persevere with great confidence because while challenges today have caused many to give up on ministry, we are called to suffer and persevere knowing that at the proper time, we will reap a harvest (Galatians 6:9). I have summarized the gist of his speech here to preserve the memory of it because after next year’s commencement ceremony, this video may no longer be available, but if you are reading this before May 2024, I strongly encourage you to listen to his speech, as his delivery is amazing, and like I said, you just don’t get that level of passion and sincerity from white American pastors.
But getting back to my weird emotional state, this state was actually not at all simply due to forfeiting the pageantry of in-person commencement. In fact, I wonder if had I attended commencement in-person, I might have been distracted by the pageantry, thinking about walking across the stage, the celebration with family afterward, that I might not have paid as close attention to Sanji Lukas’s speech. My weird emotional state was due to the fact that when I decided to pursue this certificate during the pandemic, I sensed God calling me to some kind of ministry. I knew after taking the Spiritual Formation class in 2021 that I did not want to be a pastor, as I read several chapters in this class about church growth and how to stay spiritually grounded and healthy in this demanding vocation that just left a bad taste in my mouth. I thought I might be suited to chaplaincy, but sensed God whispering this may not be a good fit for me every time I visited Granny in the nursing home. So as much as I enjoyed these courses and the much deeper understanding and appreciation for the Bible which I have gained from them, I felt just as unsure of God’s calling for my life as I did when I started, but the longing to do something besides work a secular job and live a comfortable, privileged life was now even stronger than ever. But then on June 11, the sermon in church was on the Parable of the Lost Sheep, and the pastor used as one of his illustrations, a story of how years ago on a family vacation, him and his wife were terrified when they realized they had lost track of their young daughter. She was quickly found, happily looking at something in a shop window, and didn’t even seem to realize she was lost. With this illustration, all of the passionate essays I have written about social justice issues and the alarming number of Christians who support policies that are not Christian at all came to mind, and I sensed God might be whispering to me, “why don’t you make that your ministry? All of those Christians who subscribe to the dangerous ideology of Christian nationalism are like lost sheep who do not realize they are lost. Of course, only God knows what is in each person’s heart, and I believe God is more than capable of sorting out who are the true wolves in sheep’s clothing, and who are the innocent victims of these wolves whose hearts are good but who don’t realize they have been misled. Traditionally, Christian missions have focused on those in need of salvation, those who are unreached or have never heard the gospel, or on people who grew up going to church but never made a personal commitment to follow Christ. This prioritization is understandable because once someone has accepted Christ, their salvation is secure. Once we have accepted Christ, we should do our best to turn away from sin, but the reality is, we live in a fallen world and will always be works in progress this side of heaven. If the occasional racist comment or nationalistic attitude were all it took to lose your salvation, no one would qualify for heaven, and in fact it is because we are all undeserving of salvation that Christ came and sacrificed his life for the sins of the world. But I believe biblically sound churches who recognize that Christian nationalism is not really Christian at all but don’t want to offend anyone by addressing this issue directly are making a mistake because these innocent sheep who have been led astray are giving Christianity a bad name, making it uninviting to a watching world, especially young people, and in this way are indirectly preventing many from coming to Christ and receiving salvation. My heart also breaks for these lost sheep because they are not strangers from some distant land. They are our friends, neighbors, Bible study classmates, members of our extended family. They are people we know and love, nice people who you can count on to pray for you, and support you in a time of need. And yet they have been led astray by partisan media that is very slick and almost sounds Christian, but is anything but when you listen more closely.
Our church recently hired a new senior pastor, and he delivered his first sermon on July 9. It was an excellent sermon which he used to outline his values and vision for our church. One of his insights was that we need to be a church of engagement rather than entitlement. There was a time when Christianity was the only show in town, and the church was often the tallest building in town. This is no longer the case, but rather than lamenting or fighting this reality, we must engage with the culture, present the gospel in a winsome, compelling way. When he said this, it occurred to me that at the root of Christian Nationalism is an attitude of entitlement. Rather than engage in the slow but ultimately rewarding work of presenting the gospel in a loving, winsome way to one friend, neighbor, coworker at a time, Christian Nationalism seeks to use the power of the state to impose Christianity on society, dishonoring the beautiful concept of religious liberty that this country’s founders intended, and distorting the Christian gospel in the process. This sermon inspired me to send him a letter asking if the church might partner with me in facilitating a life group that directly addresses this ideology. Christians Against Christian Nationalism has a free curriculum based on a podcast series they hosted on the subject, or the class could be a sort of book club as I have read several excellent books on this subject, including Twelve Lies that Hold America Captive, which I wrote about here. I am still waiting to hear back from him, but Mom cautioned me not to be discouraged if the church says no as they may not want to do anything controversial like this. I also recognize that I may be a bit full of myself, freshly graduated from a renowned seminary with a Certificate in Christian Studies, so I will have the humility to accept that church leaders with more education and life experience may have perspective that I don’t have. But regardless of whether or not the church supports me facilitating a life group, I felt inspired to start a blog, Lost Sheep in the Church. It is my goal to post to this blog once a week. The posts on this blog will be much shorter than what I write here. There are a lot of writers on this subject far more qualified than I am who have written excellent, academic essays on the subject, most notably Red Letter Christians, but my aim is to provide bite-size food for thought, in a casual, accessible tone. I also promised that this blog would not be overtly political, as Jesus was neither a Democrat nor a Republican, and all earthly governments fall far short of God’s righteous standards. Donald Trump is merely an extreme manifestation of an ideology that can be traced back to 1630, and this ideology unfortunately will most likely persist long after Donald Trump and those like him are out of the picture. I recognize that only God has the power to change hearts, and that this little blog is the David against the Goliath of partisan media. But what a privilege it would be if I could play a small part in restoring Christianity’s reputation in this country, gently guiding lost sheep back to the true Christianity, and in the process, making the gospel compelling again in our pluralistic culture. I encourage you to check it out, and if you know of any friends, neighbors, family that might benefit, feel free to share it with them. And if you are Christian, please pray for my little ministry, most importantly, that my blog never takes on a self-righteous, judgmental tone, a temptation I fear I could succumb to. Who knows. Maybe if I and like-minded Christians preach the true gospel, pray, partner with one another and persevere, we can bring about the revival of Christianity that evangelicals dream of.